What things in your life tend to block your God-given purpose? We’ve been talking about several this past month: Pitfalls, Excuses, and Self-sabotage.
After reading Katie Brazelton’s book Praying for Purpose, a theme became obvious in my life, one that has been consistent through the years. At the end of the book, when asked “What baggage do you need to unload?” I realized this persistent theme had to go.
What is it?
My greatest hindrance is my own lack of self-worth. What a shock! I consider myself an emotionally healthy, fifty-eight year old Christian woman, who walks in God confidence.
Except when I don’t.
Which happens more often than I like to admit. It’s the heavy load I need to release!
Trying to figure out the REASONS for this low self worth took a lot of soul searching prayer. Several things that were deeply ingrained in me had a tendency to hold me back:
Comparison. So very often, I fall into the comparison trap. I’ll never have the looks or talent she has. I’ll never be able to write like she does. I’ll never…Hmmm, maybe it isn’t so much about comparison as it is my defeatist, negative attitude.
Past mistakes. Ouch! My face burns crimson and my ears smoke with fiery shame as I remember all the mistakes, missteps and misspoken words through the years. Cringing in embarrassment, I crawl further into my shell, shielding myself (or so I think) from the condemning voice I hear: I can’t believe you did that! How stupid. That was a goofy thing to say, I’m sure everyone is laughing at you.

Do you see the common denominator here? The voice of recrimination whispering repeatedly in my head is not mine. It’s the voice of the accuser, the father of lies, Satan.
“…For the accuser of our brothers and sisters has been thrown down to earth—the one who accuses them before our God day and night.” Revelation 12:10 NLT
Satan sees my progress in Christ, and throws roadblocks in the way to deter me. He’s trying to trip me up.
Whenever we venture out to take new land or to fulfill part of God’s purpose for us, opposition comes. The enemy predictably stirs up fears, brings up old failures, and throws a wet blanket of condemnation to extinguish our fiery passion. Susie Larson, Your Beautiful Purpose, Page 99
Satan can’t read my mind, he is not all knowing, but he is conniving. He senses my fearful personality and tendency toward low self-worth. He probably figures I won’t think enough of myself and my serving to realize that he would mess with me. After all, who am I, that Satan should worry about me being effective for God’s kingdom?
The more we gain ground in Christlikeness, the more apt we are to walk out our God-given call and, as a result, the more our lives become a threat to the enemy. The devil hates a transformed life. Susie Larson, Your Beautiful Purpose Page 72
This is war! And the best way to fight it is with the truth of who I am in the eyes of Jesus. I am loved, valuable and precious. And you are too.
Won’t you join me next month, as we delve in to our identities in Christ?
Grace be with you,
Debbie says
So can relate to experiencing Satan throwing up roadblocks as we work to establish a 12-Step Study for Celebrate Recovery… However, our God is bigger than anything the devil places in front of us!! Thanks for sharing what He has placed on your heart and for being so honest and transparent with us in your writing ❤️
Ellen says
Oh, Deb, I’ll bet you can! CR is such a needed ministry in our community! Thanks friend!
Heather says
—> Whenever we venture out to take new land or to fulfill part of God’s purpose for us, opposition comes.—- ABSOLUTELY Yes… so many victories are followed by valleys… And Satan will use any means necessary to distract us and lead us further astray. I think your site and your writing is lovely Ellen– and you topic has been very close to my heart lately as I try to dig down and hone my own God-given purpose. Writing? Music? Design? Ministry? Vintage Shows? I have lots of heavy feelings about them all- but I’m praying to know which ones to put down and which ones to carry on with. Thanks for a timely post ♥
Ellen says
SO glad you stopped in today Heather! Yes, he does tend to distract us, doesn’t he! I love how you express your “heavy” feelings about your passions! That is beautiful…And weighty! Thank you for your encouragement today!
Gayl says
“This is war! And the best way to fight it is with the truth of who I am in the eyes of Jesus. I am loved, valuable and precious. And you are too.” Amen, Ellen.
Thanks for this reminder that I seem to need very often. Blessings to you! I’m your neighbor at the #RaRaLinkup today! Blessings to you!
Ellen says
Hey Gayl! Yes, why is it that we seem to need this reminder so often?? Let’s fill ourselves with His truth! Thanks for visiting Gayl!
Ruth says
I’ve been reading the book of Job. Talk about the accuser! He even accused God of basically paying Job to be good. Now that’s some serious lying.
But praise God that He is victorious and gives us the victory through our faith in Him and His Word! 🙂
Ellen says
Praise Him indeed for the victory, Ruth! Goodness, what an accuser he is, so sly and cunning!Thanks for visiting and for your encouraging comments
Carmen Horne says
Right to the heart of the matter, “The devil hates a transformed life.” I sabotage myself by using my tendency to get lots of good ideas started, and then struggling to complete the task. This was a great post, Ellen!
Ellen says
Oh, me too, Carmen! Inseams so often I am a starter, but never a finisher! Thanks for stopping by!